Bargain Bin Boyfriend

[Intro]
[Verse]
You walk in at noon
Humming a synth-pop tune
Adjusting your plastic frames
Dropping all the indie names
You touch the velvet vest
Clutching it to your chest
Asking if I like the fit
I really do not care a bit
[Pre-Chorus]
You flash a neon fanny pack
Trying hard to look so cool
You tell me vinyl's coming back
But you just look like a fool
[Chorus]
Oh, step away
From the bargain rack today
No, I will not date you
I just want to rate you
With your giant shoulder pads
Chasing all the retro fads
Put the record down
And get out of town
[Post-Chorus]
Pay for the coat
Please do not gloat
Clear your throat
Get off my boat
[Verse]
You brag about your band
The worst garage in the land
You play the Farfisa keys
Begging for attention, please
You buy a scratchy disc
Taking such a fashion risk
Flirting with a sleepy sigh
I just roll my heavy eye
[Pre-Chorus]
You wear a faded yellow strap
Looking like an old cartoon
I am tired of your trap
Underneath the dusty moon
[Chorus]
Oh, step away
From the bargain rack today
No, I will not date you
I just want to rate you
With your giant shoulder pads
Chasing all the retro fads
Put the record down
And get out of town
[Bridge]
Glockenspiel is ringing out
Hear the analog synths shout
Fretless bass is jumping high
Watch the silly hipsters sigh
Saturday is finally done
None of this was very fun
[Chorus]
Oh, step away
From the bargain rack today
No, I will not date you
I just want to rate you
With your giant shoulder pads
Chasing all the retro fads
Put the record down
And get out of town
[Outro]